The 3 Stages of Thanksgiving Hangover

We all love Thanksgiving! All the food and none of the gift-giving obligations of Christmas. At the end of the night, you feel satisfied: football was watched, bird was carved, thanks were given, family tensions were renewed, drunk friends were hugged, and the tofurkey was dutifully ignored by all—even the vegans.

The tofurkey. Intact.

The bliss ends soon. Driving home (or cleaning home), you already feel as stuffed as the unfortunate bird was a few hours before. The cranberry sauce doesn’t taste as good when it is burped. That’s Stage One of Thanksgiving Hangover.

Black Friday comes, and you hope to lose all excess fat, calories, sugar, and carbs by standing up for hours, folding and unfolding flyers and coupon printouts, sending and receiving texts, and making your eyeballs go really fast from one price sticker to the next. Sadly, that workout doesn’t work out. You feel a crushing guilt about splurging on a third espresso machine (it was 60% off!) and on an Amazon Prime card with a hefty annual fee. Second Stage.

Sunday night, you help the kids—past their bedtime—with their forgotten homework and realize that the house needs another cleaning. The pesky, long weekend ends with a bottle of wine and a mind-numbing DVR-watching session. After a four-day holiday, you are exhausted, and you’ve gained a few pounds. Screams of over-excited kids, caged for half a week, still echo inside your head when you go to sleep—late. That’s Stage Three.

But Monday morning, after driving them to school, you find yourself with your favorite mug of coffee. Your room, in your office or home, is silent. You smile and get back to your routine.

You love your life, your family, your friends. What a special holiday! You love Thanksgiving.

Did it sound familiar? Please share your Thanksgiving Hangover experiences!

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52 comments on “The 3 Stages of Thanksgiving Hangover

    1. Fabio Bueno

      It’s a mystery! Maybe some of us feel obligated to have as many plate options as we can, and tofurky seems to be Thanksgiving-friendly…
      Glad you stopped by, Diane!

  1. gingercalem

    You described mine almost exactly. We gathered, ate, laughed and had fun. But, I did NOT do the shopping bit. I huddled blissfully at home instead. (Yay me!) We pulled out decorations, battled our Christmas tree, tangled up our lights, and told the kids repeatedly that we weren’t shopping because Christmas was around the corner and to put their wishes on a list for Santa. :)

    Today, got all the natives off to school, make a cup of tea and am enjoying the blissful solitude in my home!

    1. Fabio Bueno

      Hi, Ginger! I like your Christmas wish-list solution–I may use it next year. Enjoy the peaceful Monday :)

  2. Kecia Adams (@KeciaAdams)

    Wow! Spot on. You were definitely a fly on my wall! Well, except (like Ginger above) I never brave the crowds on Black Friday–sure recipe for wanting to stab someone in the eyeballs–I avoid it entirely. We did get a small taste of crowd overload by going to a movie on Sat nite. Geez, the movie pickings were slim this year for the T-giving four day. Maybe a conspiracy to get people to buy instead of watch…
    Got a TON of stuff done this morning, however. Shopped online and am having everything shipped for “FREE” cuz it’s cyber Mon. :)
    Well done on the blog look, BTW. Really like the tagline too. ;)

    1. Fabio Bueno

      Hi, Kecia! You are right, only kids had good movie options this weekend. Black Fridays are crazy, aren’t they? I’ve been shopping mostly online the last few years.
      Thank you for the blog love!

  3. Shannon Esposito

    Congrats on your first post! Yep, I totally went through all the Thanksgiving hangover steps (including the bottle of wine last night :-) We had a four hour drive to our family’s house and the ride home was miserable. Dropping the kids off at school was bliss this morning!

    1. Fabio Bueno

      Wine and mindless TV watching are essential to decompress after a Thanksgiving weekedn (with a four-hour drive to boot)! Thanks for sharing your experience, Shannon.

  4. timlobrien

    Ahhhh…the peaceful sound of Monday morning silence. I was out of town for six days – no internet, no cell phone reception, and no Black Friday pepper spray! The only time the television comes on for six days is when we all gather to watch a football game.
    And I agree with Kecia, your site looks great and the tagline is perfect.

    1. Fabio Bueno

      Hi, Tim. That seems like a great thanksgiving holiday! I only watched Packer-Lions this weekend (and half of my Seahawks game–but they can’t call themselves a football team anymore). The tagline is one of the gifts from the WANA gang; I’m glad you liked it.

  5. Karen McFarland

    Yeah Fabio, love your blog! And I like you theme too!

    Doesn’t it feel great to launch? All the stress behind you? I was stressed out when I finally hit the blogoshere, so I can imagine how relieved you must feel.

    Great job! Look forward to many more. :)

    1. Fabio Bueno

      Karen, thanks for the blog love! I browsed for themes for weeks. I liked several of them, but this one is ideal for me.
      You’re right, relief is the perfect word to describe my feelings. But this is just one milestone: I still have so much to learn about blogging. Luckily, I have you and our fellow WANA peeps to show me the way!

      1. Karen McFarland

        You’ll want to pop on by tomorrow, I’ve got some great tips for blogging in store! Shhh! It’s a secret! :)

        1. Fabio Bueno

          I can’t wait!

    1. Fabio Bueno

      Thanks, Myndi! Having a blog is exciting but also scary. With a blog comes great responsibility :)

  6. Lynn Kelley

    Woo hoo, Fabio! Your first post is great! You nailed the Thanksgiving hangover! I was so wiped out for two days after. Yesterday I got a lot done. Wonderful post!

    1. Fabio Bueno

      Thanks for the encouraging words, Lynn! I’m still recovering from the long holiday. I love it, but I’m happy it’s just once a year…

  7. Julie

    So glad to see your blog up and running! Loved the post! And I did smile and sigh contentedly when my kids went out the door this morning and I was able to get back to work and routine. :-)

    1. Fabio Bueno

      Thank you, Julie! Isn’t it nice? My house is so calm I can hear the silence…

  8. Tameri Etherton

    Too funny! You totally nailed it. I kind of like the Black Friday thing, but this year went out later with my daughter and managed to get all of her Christmas gifts and a few for the boy. Now I just have to decorate, plan the holiday party, wrap the gifts, ugh. I’m going to make more tea and enjoy the silence!

    1. Fabio Bueno

      Hi, Tameri! We can barely rest after Thanksgiving–more holidays in the horizon. Sometimes it feels like the year is already over.

  9. Prudence MacLeod

    Ah yes, that first cup of coffee enjoyed in silence after days of madness. priceless. Great post, Fabio, we have all been there at one time or another.

    1. Fabio Bueno

      Thanks for visiting, Prudence! This morning’s cup of coffee tasted really good for some reason :)

  10. August McLaughlin

    Ha! I love it. Great post, Fabio. Kinda makes me wish I had a holiday hangover tale to share! I can recall many, but not with enough clarity to share. This year, I had the pleasure of waking up in a peaceful hotel. Ah… I highly recommend it. ;)

    I do recall Tofurkeys from years past… So perplexing. Few vegans I know wish to eat soy that looks like an animal, eats like a sponge!

    1. Fabio Bueno

      Hello, August! I like the frenzy of Thanksgiving (especially this year, with friends and family showing up), but I also appreciate–a lot–the peace afterward. The tofurkey still mistifies me.

  11. Debra Kristi

    Great job Fabio! No Black Friday shopping here either. I do all my shopping on-line if I can. I am usually feeling far to sluggish after the meal from the day before! :D Plus I just can’t stand the crowds.

    1. Fabio Bueno

      I like shopping online too, Debra. The only physical mishap might be carpal tunnel syndrome caused by clicking the whole day. But, hey, worth it if I can score a 40%-off xbox game! Thanks for reading.

    1. Fabio Bueno

      Hi, Angela! I have no idea how to spell tofurkey–and I have no idea why people still buy it…

  12. Sheila Seabrook

    I’m up in Canada, so we celebrated our Thanksgiving in October. With, of course, lots of food and family. But thankfully didn’t have any tofurkey. LOL! Love your humor, Fabio. :)

    1. Fabio Bueno

      Glad you visited the blog, Sheila! Well, next year you have something else to be thankful for: no tofurkey! :)

    1. Fabio Bueno

      Hey, Mike! At least you have your movie collection to look forward to. Thanks for visiting!

  13. rachelfunkheller

    Fabio!!!!
    I knew you had it in you to be FABIO-OLUS! Great job. I for one, love the T-day hangover. While my husband and my mom went for turkey sandwiches last night, I still wanted all the gluttony of mashers, gravy and stuffing, mwahahahaha. I want it to last forever…. but you are right about the reality check. It’s back to work, back to blogging, and back to life. Good job and a great first post.

    1. Fabio Bueno

      Hi, Rachel! I can’t resist the leftovers either–they beckon from the fridge.
      If someday I decide to change my name legally, I’ll consider “Fabulous” :) Thanks for the kind words.

  14. Pat O'Dea Rosen

    Congrats on your blog launch, Fabio. The site looks sharp, and I can relate to your first post. I’m still laughing at “family tensions were renewed.”

  15. Louise Behiel

    Great first blog, Fabio. I love the look of it, with the date tagged on the edge of the book.

    I had to laugh at the Thanksgiving Hangover. In my Canadian family, thanksgiving is important but because it comes in October, it doesn’t tie into shopping, or Black Friday or anything else like that. we eat too much, some of us drink too much, but our holiday is on Monday, so we know we have to go back to work the next day.

    thanks for reminding me of how my Christmas used to be.

    1. Fabio Bueno

      LOL! You are into something, Louise: if the shopping took place before the holiday (and took a whole month), Christmas and American Thanksgiving would be very similar…
      Sorry, Canadian friends; I should’ve specified the post was about Thanksgiving in the States.
      Thank you for commenting!

  16. Anthony V. Toscano

    Fabio,

    First of all, congrats on your blog.

    True enough that the bliss ends, but not so soon for me. I spent my Thanksgiving evening this year with a group of new friends, friends I met just one year ago, most of them writers, most of them more talented by far than I am as a writer. I loved asking people questions about their interests, and loved even more listening to their answers.

    Most of all, though, I enjoyed knowing that all eight people at the table held one desire in common: to care about and for each other.

    1. Fabio Bueno

      Anthony, it sounds like you had a great time! My critique group is very similar to the group you described: amazing friends who happen to be very talented writers. Thanks for sharing your Thanksgiving tale with us!

  17. Alicia Street

    Sorry to chime in so late. I’m way behind on everything, but I just have to say you did a great job on this first post! Too true, funny and warm. Love it!
    And congrats on taking the plunge. I’m planning my first for next Monday and I’m in no where near ready.

    1. Fabio Bueno

      Thanks for the compliments, Alicia! I didn’t feel ready either, but our WANA friends were helpful and supportive. I can’t wait for your blog.

  18. speaker7

    Is it wrong that the the three-day Thanksgiving hangover is something I experience on a daily basis?

    1. Fabio Bueno

      I asked the Thanksgiving Police. Here’s what they said:
      “Oh, no! It’s VERY wrong! *shakes head in disapproval* I’m afraid she needs to show up in court and sign up for Thanksgiving rehab.”
      Sorry I got you in trouble :(

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